If Lil' Miss ever decides to hang up her zippered sweatshirts for the simpler life of the orthodox, I have no doubt in my mind she'd make a great Amish. Not only does the girl love to wear jaw-dropping, grand entrance-making costumes in public, but she's also a firm believer in gender separation. These days it's all about the "sisters before misters".
Just this morning while we were all cuddling in bed together, she scooted over by me and announced to Honk, "This is the girl's side. No boys allowed!" Last weekend, on our way to a friend's house for a Thanksgiving Potluck dinner she asked, "Mom, will all the girls be together in one room and the boys in another?" To say the kid is obsessed with female solidarity is an understatement.
This probably explains why I don't have much alone time anymore. Every outing, every errand, and every room I enter is accompanied by my pint-sized girlfriend. We are not only joined at the hip, but at the leg, the arm, and the head. (Did I mention the earlobes? Yeah, the earlobes too.) As XX chromosomes, I'm guessing she feels a special bond with me, like we're on the same team or that we come from the same litter of puppies. When we're together, walking and holding hands, she likes to say, "Mom, you and me, we're girls together!" When were getting ready in the morning she'll suggest, "Mom, let's both wear pink today because we're girls together!" Or my favorite one, "Mom, don't worry. I'll stay and watch you go potty because we're GIRLS TOGETHER!"
For the most part, I think it's sweet and cute and funny. Honk thinks it's annoying. Lil' Miss is constantly reprimanding him for invading our girl space. The other morning when Lil' Miss crawled into bed with us, we struck up an impassioned discussion about poenawlish. And right as our pink vs. red debate started to get a little heated, Honk tried to cut in with a question of his own. Lil' Miss rolled her eyes and let out an exasperated sigh. She flipped over to face him and held up a stop-sign hand, "Dad, hold on a second. HOLD ON!" Then she turned back toward me and said, "I'm sorry, what were you saying, Mom?" Feeling more than a little slighted, Honk reminded her, "Hey I'M the adult and YOU'RE the kid here!" Honk has been announcing this obvious but largely ignored fact a lot lately.
As you can imagine, this Girl Power is REALLY infringing on Honk's attempts to "mess with me". It's kind of like having a junior high best friend all over again. She's fun, sweet, and a bit on the possessive side, giving your other friends the dagger eyes of death when they come within five yards of you. Last Saturday morning, I completely overslept and was still conked out when Honk returned home from running errands with Lil' Miss. He came lumbering into our room like Paul Bunyan, all loud and obnoxious, banging things around and making a huge ruckus. Then he dove onto the bed and flopped around like a carp fish, trying to crush me in my deep sleep. When that only brought about slight moanings, he set in with the expected poking and prodding until I was sounding less like a cow and more like a ticked-off wife. But I didn't need to take action. The Girlinator had already come to my rescue. "Dad! Leave her alone! LEAVE HER ALONE!!!" She was literally shooing him out of the room. And just before she closed the door behind her so I could work out my grogginess in peace, she peeked her head in the door and said, "Sorry 'bout that, Mom. Sorry 'bout that."
I always knew I'd feel protective towards my kids. I just never figured they'd feel the same about me. I'm sure this female unity phase is just that, and soon she'll go back to being a Daddy's girl. So, I think I'll milk this one for as long as I can.
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